Know what no one tells you about weight loss? The identity crisis. I had tried to shed the weight before, unsuccessfully, for years. I was convinced that my biggest size was where I’d be spending the rest of my days, cringing through body shaming toxic environments. Nah, bro. I did the work to love myself at that size and it wasn’t always easy, but I did it. The universe went “that’s nice” and gave me a huge wake up call in June involving my blood pressure skyrocketing to ER levels. I started the keto diet and am down 50 lbs. Yay, right? Sure, totally. But, the part of me that I learned to love at my largest felt PISSED. Downright betrayed. “ExCUSE you…I thought we were cool.” That reaction was completely unexpected…did I do my job of loving that part TOO well? Why was I feeling devastated when my body was gaining energy? I wasn’t going to let this part have her way anymore, but I did need to give her a little space so, I made this video. It sucked. I’m naked and raw in this. It’s uncomfortable to talk about any of this. But it’s also freeing, so, here we are.